{"id":396,"date":"2021-04-01T14:00:00","date_gmt":"2021-04-01T14:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wickedsister.evit.com.au\/index.php\/2021\/04\/01\/the-last-laugh\/"},"modified":"2021-04-01T14:00:00","modified_gmt":"2021-04-01T14:00:00","slug":"the-last-laugh","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wickedsister.evit.com.au\/index.php\/2021\/04\/01\/the-last-laugh\/","title":{"rendered":"The Last Laugh"},"content":{"rendered":"

My heart is in my stomach.<\/strong>
\u00a0
My mouth is dry and he\u2019s standing there, almost bracing himself, scanning my face for a reaction.
\u00a0
But I am numb \u2014 not in the tingly MS way, but I\u2019m briefly stunned, mentally and emotionally.
\u00a0
My husband has just revealed to me that a longtime friend of his, someone he trusted in moments of private human emotion, has likened me to a child and, further implied, a burden.
\u00a0
A burden.<\/strong>
\u00a0
My first instinct is to approach this, leading with my current emotional state and with the ferocity of Cujo, himself. Did this person really expect my husband to double over in fits of laughter at this \u201cjoke?\u201d Would this person still have said that if my MS symptoms were more visible? At what point do hurtful \u201cjokes\u201d become off-limits? Does this person think I\u2019m less human than everyone else? That I don\u2019t mourn for my formal normalcy? That I don\u2019t already sometimes feel like a weight on my husband\u2019s shoulders, afraid that he might tire of this life and leave?
\u00a0
I\u2019ve lived with diagnosed MS for just under three years and I am fortunate to be able to say that, aside from some mild inconvenient symptoms, I am able to ambulate, enunciate, urinate, and generally function without being affected too dramatically. But I do get fatigued. It\u2019s an indescribable, crushing heaviness that I never knew could exist. Sometimes my daily allotted energy reserve is nearly depleted before I leave for work in the morning. In an effort to help conserve my energy, my amazing husband steps up when I cannot (and even if I can!) to run our household.
\u00a0
He is still human, however, and sometimes things get overwhelming and he seeks solace in friends. I encourage it.
\u00a0
I am so fortunate that my disease isn\u2019t progressing at the rate that it does for some, but as stupid as the cruel attempt at \u201chumor\u201d was, it was still a reminder of the vast universe of unknowns and uncertainties that lie ahead. It was a reminder that, despite my mostly untouched mobility and clarity, I am still sick \u2014 even though I don\u2019t look the part.
\u00a0
A burden.<\/strong>
\u00a0
There was no apology offered, nor a shred of remorse detected for making an unprovoked comment about my husband being my caretaker.
\u00a0
I should be livid.
\u00a0
But something strange happened in those moments following my husband sharing this information with me.
\u00a0
I took all of that flaming hot focus off of this person and instead, reined it in and directed it to the one who really deserves my energy: my husband, for not only being so hopelessly devoted to us every day, but for standing up to his friend on my behalf. On\u00a0our<\/strong>\u00a0behalf.
\u00a0
The reality is that MS will not beat us. I may not have chosen to share my life with MS, but my husband did. He chose\u00a0me<\/strong>.
\u00a0
In moments of darkness, I urge you to remember your source of strength \u2014 whatever it is \u2014 and always hold it close to you. And you know what? Hold your caretakers close, too.
\u00a0
The vampires of this world may not always reveal themselves right away, wear a name tag, or emblazon it on a license plate, but they are thankfully few and far between. Sometimes people just don\u2019t know any better.
\u00a0
So, I will teach them. I will show them.<\/p>\n

This article was authored by Cat Stappas and originally published on the National Multiple Sclerosis Society’s blog, MSConnection.org, on April 1, 2016.\u00a0\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

Source: itsonlyabruise.com<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

My heart is in my stomach.\u00a0My mouth is dry and he\u2019s standing there, almost bracing himself, scanning my face for a reaction.\u00a0But I am numb \u2014 not in the tingly MS way, but I\u2019m briefly stunned, mentally and emotionally.\u00a0My husband has just revealed to me that a longtime friend of his, someone he trusted in…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":0,"featured_media":397,"comment_status":"","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[11,15,9,8,13,14,12,10],"class_list":["post-396","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-multiple-sclerosis-research","tag-brain-repair","tag-marburg-type-ms","tag-ms","tag-multiple-sclerosis","tag-myelin","tag-neuroregeneration","tag-oligodendrocyte","tag-remyelination"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wickedsister.evit.com.au\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/396","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wickedsister.evit.com.au\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wickedsister.evit.com.au\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wickedsister.evit.com.au\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=396"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/wickedsister.evit.com.au\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/396\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wickedsister.evit.com.au\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/397"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wickedsister.evit.com.au\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=396"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wickedsister.evit.com.au\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=396"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wickedsister.evit.com.au\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=396"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}